*Beethoven's Fifth, also, the movie's way of answering Dottie's question*
Truck: Here we go again.
Caretaker: (off-screen) I'm a poor lonely old sap and since you're hanging out with me even though I should be doing my job and keeping you out of here because it's outside visiting hours, I'm gonna sit here and drink with you. What are we drinking to?
Rookery: (off-screen) Well, that's an excellent question. I propose a toast to dead people. And vampires. Those, too.
Caretaker: Eh, whatever. But you know vampires don't exist, right?
Rookery: You've really got the wrong attitude for this movie.
Caretaker: Now, what's that supposed to mean?
Rookery: (delivering one of my favorite lines ever from this movie even though it comes from a bad guy (but in this version it's a bit premature)) There's a whole other world out there, if you just know how to look for it.
Caretaker: You don't say!
Caretaker: What else is in this other world? Magic?
Rookery: You'd be surprised. Let me let you in on a little secret.
Rookery: Magic's real.
Caretaker: *is slackjawed that he called it*
Rookery: You see the amulet around my neck?
Rookery: Don't touch it.
Caretaker: Why on Earth not?
Rookery: It is infused with great power and has been handed down in my family for generations. The vampires have a nearly identical one, though theirs is symbolically different colors. Theirs is supposed to make those filthy vermin human and this is supposed to put them right where they belong.
Rookery: In Hell.
*symbolism--I don't care how the lighting slices it*
Caretaker: But if this is a kid's movie with vampires in it and you're the creepy middle-aged vampire hunter, aren't you supposed to be the bad guy?
Rookery: Shut up
*is trying to hide being scared stiff*
Rookery: Come'ere. There's more.
Caretaker: I'm listening.
Rookery: This movie gave up on being good for kids under the age of eight ages ago.
Rookery: You see what I'm saying?
Caretaker: This is about that thing with the pistol, isn't it.
Rookery: Quiet. I think I hear something.
Rookery: I did. It went this way.
Caretaker: (to himself) This guy's half way to the bedlam house, but what've I got to lose by going along with him?
Caretaker: At least he came prepared.
Rookery: Now where is that thing?
Caretaker: Careful! Half these gravestones are crumbling by the hour!
Rookery: Oh, good. It's still standing. I was afraid they'd have torn it down by now. Somehow.
Caretaker: They? What do you mean by 'they'? And what the hell is this thing?
Caretaker: It looks like it's big enough to lower someone down into this hole with.
Rookery: That's the idea.
Rookery: Now, my guess is, if there is a vampire around, it went down this here hole. I'm going to lower myself down this here hole using this here winch and lattice.
Caretaker: You're out of your bloomin' mind.
Rookery: And once I lower myself down this here hole--
Rookery: What did you just say to me?
Caretaker: Just...that you're crazy to go down into some unknown hole in my graveyard after a mythical creature.
Caretaker: It's my graveyard. I'll know my way around. I should be the one going after mythical creatures.
Rookery: (inner dialogue) Wow, this is too easy.
Rookery: (actual line) Well, um...if you insist.
Caretaker: You're darn right I do... (small voice) I think.
Gregory: (telepathically) Does anything sound off to you?
Rudolph: (telepathically) Five more minutes, Mum.
Gregory: (telepathically) It's me, you dolt.
Rudolph: (telepathically) Shut up. I'm trying to sleep here.
Rookery: Now take the flashlight. It's pretty dark down there.
Rookery: Now just step off the edges of the hole and relax. This'll be nice and easy.
Caretaker: Wow, that's a creepy looking hole.
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