Without further ado, I give to you, THE LITTLE VAMPIRE Abridged!
Gregory: Why is the title of our movie floating in the sky?
Rudolph: I don't think we're supposed to see that. Besides, you're not supposed to ask questions. You're a plot device, remember?
Frederick: Stop bickering. I'm trying to focus.
Von: It would really suck if you forgot the words right now.
Frederick: Don't worry, Von. I know what I'm doing.
Anna: *is half-asleep*
*Frederick says the words and magic happens.*
Gregory: Vive La Resistance!
Stoned guy in the background: I'm never going back to an opium den again.
Vampire Hunter: CHAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGE!
Rudolph: Let me at him! Let me at him!
Frederick: No, Rudolph. You must survive this. The moral of the story rides on your shoulders.
Gregory: What about me?
Frederick: The plot still needs you.
Frederick: This one has had way too many lines in the past, and that's a score I need to settle myself.
Vampire Hunter: Oh, we'll settle this, alright, you undead bloodsucking leach.
Frederick: Stop speaking, you plebeian slime!
Vampire Hunter: I will still stake you and get that magical amulet to send you all to Hell, where you belong.
*They fight.*
Stone of Attamon: You people really need to figure out how to properly secure me because I'm pretty sure I'm going to--
Stone of Attamon: I knew it.
Von: You've done it now.
Von: I'm so dead.
Stone of Attamon: Will one of you bickering morons catch me please?
Tony: How'd I get here? Is my bed floating in the water or right above it? What's going on?
Von: *is chasing the stone*
Stone of Attamon: Nope, I guess I'm doomed.
Tony: Stuff's hitting the fan now.
Tony: Am I supposed to think that vampire wants to kill me?
Tony: Phew. Glad that's over. Now all I have to do is have an obligatory nightmare reaction and be scared of everything I see as I run down the hall to my parents.
*is a stuffed monkey*
Tony: Okay, the camera people have to do better than that.
*first appearance of Obviously Not the Wind*
Tony: YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
*trips*
Dottie: Burglar?
Bob: Huh? Oh. It's too early for this.
Bob: You ask me, this kid of yours needs to stop having these ridiculous nightmares about vampires. Why can't he dream about something normal, like killer clowns?
Dottie: Why am I still married to you?
Tony: They're not nightmares. You just tell me to say that because it's socially correct.
Dottie: Tony, please don't get into this. C'mon, get into bed. We're gonna try to pass the rest of the night without incident, alright? Can we do that?
Tony: Okay.
Obviously Not the Wind: *is obviously not the wind*
Tony: Hear that? I told you I wasn't crazy.
Bob: Tony, you're crazy. Now let me get some sleep.
Obviously Not the Wind: Phase one complete. Now on to phase two: get delirious enough to mistake them for vampires later.
Tony: Dad, seriously. It talked. Tell me you didn't hear that. .......................Dad? Dad?
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