TLV Abridged: Scene 1 - Just a Dream - Part 1

Due to length concerns, scene one will be a multi-part affair. Expect to see this fairly often, as some scenes are quite long.

Without further ado, I give to you, THE LITTLE VAMPIRE Abridged!





Gregory: Why is the title of our movie floating in the sky?

Rudolph: I don't think we're supposed to see that. Besides, you're not supposed to ask questions. You're a plot device, remember?

Frederick: Stop bickering. I'm trying to focus.

Von: It would really suck if you forgot the words right now.

Frederick: Don't worry, Von. I know what I'm doing.

Anna: *is half-asleep*

*Frederick says the words and magic happens.*

Gregory: Vive La Resistance!

Stoned guy in the background: I'm never going back to an opium den again.

Vampire Hunter: CHAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGE!



Rudolph: Let me at him! Let me at him!

Frederick: No, Rudolph. You must survive this. The moral of the story rides on your shoulders.
Gregory: What about me?
Frederick: The plot still needs you.

Frederick: This one has had way too many lines in the past, and that's a score I need to settle myself.

Vampire Hunter: Oh, we'll settle this, alright, you undead bloodsucking leach.

Frederick: Stop speaking, you plebeian slime!

Vampire Hunter: I will still stake you and get that magical amulet to send you all to Hell, where you belong.

*They fight.*

Stone of Attamon: You people really need to figure out how to properly secure me because I'm pretty sure I'm going to--

Stone of Attamon: I knew it.

Von: You've done it now.

Von: I'm so dead.

Stone of Attamon: Will one of you bickering morons catch me please?

Tony: How'd I get here? Is my bed floating in the water or right above it? What's going on?

Von: *is chasing the stone*

Stone of Attamon: Nope, I guess I'm doomed.

Tony: Stuff's hitting the fan now.

Tony: Am I supposed to think that vampire wants to kill me?

Tony: Phew. Glad that's over. Now all I have to do is have an obligatory nightmare reaction and be scared of everything I see as I run down the hall to my parents.

*is a stuffed monkey*

Tony: Okay, the camera people have to do better than that.

*first appearance of Obviously Not the Wind*

Tony: YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

*trips*

Dottie: Burglar?

Bob: Huh? Oh. It's too early for this.

Bob: You ask me, this kid of yours needs to stop having these ridiculous nightmares about vampires. Why can't he dream about something normal, like killer clowns?

Dottie: Why am I still married to you?

Tony: They're not nightmares. You just tell me to say that because it's socially correct.

Dottie: Tony, please don't get into this. C'mon, get into bed. We're gonna try to pass the rest of the night without incident, alright? Can we do that?

Tony: Okay.

Obviously Not the Wind: *is obviously not the wind*

Tony: Hear that? I told you I wasn't crazy.

Bob: Tony, you're crazy. Now let me get some sleep.

Obviously Not the Wind: Phase one complete. Now on to phase two: get delirious enough to mistake them for vampires later.

Tony: Dad, seriously. It talked. Tell me you didn't hear that. .......................Dad? Dad?