Freda: *sighs* I knew this would happen.
Freda: Gregory's escaped.
Frederick: Oh, dear.
Frederick: Where has he gone?
Freda: Where else?
Freda: Tonight's the night we're supposed to be at the cliffs.
Frederick: That reminds me---wait a minute.
Frederick: The amulet's gone!
Frederick: Gregory.
Freda: Don't make such a drastic assumption, dear.
Freda: He's the key plot device, and he's on our side.
Frederick: I suppose you're right.
Frederick: I can't feel my legs.
Freda: Is it bad?
Frederick: I certainly hope not. We need to get to the cliffs...somehow.
Freda: We'll think of something.
Frederick: Are you sure of this?
Freda: Absolutely.
Frederick: Do you hear that?
Freda: Well, that's a fortunate change of luck.
Dottie: First you tell me you like Rudolph and now you want to put out that he's a horrible influence on our son?
Bob: He's too weird.
Dottie: Too weird? Seriously? That's your excuse?
Bob: What's wrong with it?
Bob: The kid wrapped himself in foil and covered himself with a tapestry.
Dottie: And what if he has a skin condition?
Frederick and Freda: Uh...well....
Freda: Look.
Frederick: Well, fancy that.
Frederick: Our children are amazing.
Bob: Skin condition, huh?
Dottie: You're the one obsessing constantly over how "normal" our son should be.
Bob: So that's a bad thing?
Dottie: You think?
Dottie: I don't know about you but I want to know where the hell our son is.
Dottie: This is ridiculous. I have no idea who this Rudolph person is or whether Tony's dead in a ditch somewhere, and you're not helping.
Bob: Anything good on the phone sex front?
Dottie: Please, God, get him away from me.
Bob: Sorry. That was uncalled for.
*Like she hasn't heard that one before.*
*Doorbell*
Bob: I'll get it.
Dottie: Finally.
Bob: Hang on, I'm right here.
Bob: Hello?
Freda: Hello.
Bob: Where have you been all my life?
Freda: A lady never reveals her age, darling.
Freda: But I'll have you know I am a married mother of three.
Bob: Oh.
Bob: How about a one-night stand?
Dottie: Robert!
Freda: It seems the lady of the house protests.
Dottie: Who are these people?
Frederick: I am Frederick Sackville-Bagg. You've met my wife Freda.
Frederick: I am Rudolph's father.
Frederick: I'm sure you're quite worried for Tony's safety. I could tell you where he is.
Dottie: You...you could?
Frederick: Yes, I could.
*kisses*
Frederick: If the lady insists.
Dottie: Uh....well...uh...you see...
Bob: Are we supposed to be dressed funny?
Frederick and Freda: Beg pardon?
Frederick: Do you realize you're married to an idiot?
Dottie: Yes. Yes, I do.
Frederick: You see, Robert, we're not in costume.
Frederick: We are aristocrats.
Dottie: You don't say.
Freda: Honestly, Robert, you need to stop staring at me like that.
Freda: He's forgetting to drool, dear.
Dottie: Oh, I'm sure. I'm sure.
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