You're Obsessed When

You're Obsessed with The Little Vampire When...

1. You have seen the movie again and again for years
2. You go to whatever means necessary to see it again and again for years
3. You learn German to be able to watch the 1985 and 1993 series and read the original Der Kleine Vampir novels
4. It becomes your goal in life to go to Scotland and Germany, to be "on location"
5. You are capable of taking a single detail from the movie and expanding upon it for paragraphs on end
6. You keep three copies of the script to the movie: one which is held in a place of honor and never touched, a second which you carry around everywhere and refer to constantly, and a third for emergency purposes
7. Or, you want to run off a copy of the script to be able to read straight through
8. You can read the script in a single sitting
9. You can read all the books in a single sitting
10. You spend entire weekends doing nothing but things related to The Little Vampire
11. You wander through a graveyard looking for hidden crypts and vampires
12. You call the number on the side of Rookery's truck just to see if someone answers
13. You have the logo tattooed anywhere on your body
14. You try to have nightmares about vampires
15. You can't help but correct every other vampire movie you watch, regardless of who's present (parents, teacher, friends, pets, pastor...)
16. You correct every other vampire book you read, aloud, to whoever happens to be within earshot (librarian, teacher, peers, that guy who sits behind you in Biology...)
17. You instantly take notice whenever you see the names Frederick, Freda, Anna, Bob, Dottie, Tony, Rudolph, and/or Gregory anywhere at all
18. You only know who Pope Gregory is because of #17
19. You buy a giant pickup truck, paint the VampKill logo on the door, and rig it with lights, shovels, drills, and all sorts of other vampire-hunting weapons
20. You then practice on this truck, working on various disarming techniques to try whenever you run into the real thing
21. Your teacher talks about your "obsession with vampires"--and you are proud of this
22. Pretty much any other vampire book/movie/franchise reminds you of The Little Vampire
23. Your preferred method of revenge on anyone is to sneak into their bedroom late at night with a cereal box on your head, wake them from sleep, and declare yourself "the Lord/Lady of the Underworld"
24. You're upset when you realize you don't have a vampire friend to help you out with this
25. You seriously wonder about the consequences of some of the character's actions (i.e. would Tony get in trouble for impersonating Satan?)
26. Even bad reviews of The Little Vampire brighten your day
27. You foster an appreciation for deeper, more subtle aspects of the plot, setting, and characters--but only by forcing yourself to take the movie in chunks
28. You are astonished by what you mised in years of watching the movie in single sittings
29. Your love of the movie grows because the little details allow you to know it more completely
30. You know what "the movie" means
31. You put together your own soundtrack for the movie because you disagree with the official song choices
32. You have six copies of the soundtrack regardless
33. You imagine you can hear the Call
34. You try the whistle
35. You stand on a cliff in the middle of the night, swinging an amulet over your head for hours on end, and wonder why no vampires show up
36. You then realize it's because you're not a vampire and set out to become one
37. You give puzzled looks to people who call you insane for wanting to be a vampire, or who tell you it's impossible
38. The one line you invariably deliver to your babysitter come bedtime is "Bed for the undead?"
39. You talk to the DVD case as if you'll get a response (if you do get a response, then you should seek help)
40. Everything you need to know about navigating life is some nugget of wisdom from the movie, script, or books
41. You know "I'm coming" better than "Here's Johnny"
42. You believe "I'm coming" is creepier than "Here's Johnny"
43. You can identify the exact moment in the movie (down to the second) where that line (or any line, for that matter) comes from
44. You make a Little Vampire-themed fortune teller
45. You make a Little Vampire-themed Tarot deck
46. You make a Little Vampire-themed ANYTHING

That's the list as it stands right now. If you have anything to add, please number accordingly and leave it in the comments section below. Thanks a million! :)